finally i get to rest for awhile before chiong-ing again.
many are asking what happened. i duno what to say. or rather i duno how to say. and i dun want to say anything cause saying it will just cause a surge of emotions and those tears just flow out somehow. but deep in my heart, really hope that someone could just give me a solution so that i wont feel so miserable anymore.
have been trying to keep myself busy by keep working and working and working, studying and studying and studying. but somehow, you feel that at the back of your mind, there is this burden that weighs you down.
i kept thinking about those words which you said to me before. i could not bring myself to think of your bad points. those little things that you did, those touching words that you said, somehow, it just floods my mind. somehow, i cant hate you for being what you are now.
but what you did that day really pisses me off. do you know how bad i felt after that. or rather, you never know?
i really really dun wish to see those things. i am trying hard to avoid, avoid, avoid.but i dun wish history to repeat itself. i really duno how.
enough about that. the day started alright with meeting up with huiting. seeing her just cheer me up somehow. and she knows me just inside out.
school was tiring. pe was even more. circuit training. it has been so so so long since i have land training. felt really weak when doing the circuit. and somehow i dun have the motivation. guess i aint doing it with the swimmers that's why? miss those times when we will go rah rah rah to cheer pple on.
mugging with the swimmers was fun! LOLs. i mean at least, being with them just cheer me up somehow. we are swimming a 800m race now! we must jiayou!
it's ironical how i wish that pple arnd me will just cheer up and not be sad, when i cant set a good eg. irony.
i just feel like puking everything that i ate everytime. food doesnt taste that nice anymore.
am i in the wrong are are you at fault?
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