i have been through rather an emo week.
Last race on wednesday at toa payoh swimming complex. wasnt so emo until shuhan told me that everything is ending soon. the relay ended off everything.
then went to furama hotel for victory dinner. i am lazy to upload photos. but it was an awesome night with the swimmers. we take numerous photos, but they dun seem that many afterall. the many memories just suddenly flood my mind when sue kind of cried cause she couldnt give us the little message which she prepared for us.
from not being attached to the team to getting to know sue shu and rach tan, from the split in the team to the bonded as one team which we have now, from thinking that joining swimming means just going for training to now in which going for training means more time with the other swimmers, many many many things have changed. i am really really amazed by the progress which we have made over the months. the many changes made me feel that we went through years in swimming.
it's too much memories to bear. have never thought that stepping down from swim team would be so fast. i thought, the year3s have just handed the swim team to us. in the blink of an eye, we are leaving and soon we are giving the year ones to take over the team.
things did not go really right this week. i guess i really do not want to know an answer at all. i just hope to endure through this difficult period. it has been made more difficult with someone entering into the picture now. i dont know. i din know that u could actually change so fast. so fast that i could not manage to accept and cope with the change at all. i have to force myself to not think of somethings that i shouldnt think of now. it's really really hard. but i have no more tears anymore. really tired from crying. what can i say. that i really really hope that things didnt turn out this way. i wish that somehow, there is a pill call the "erase memory" pill in which after taking it, i could forget all about you, the many memories we used to share. but i guess, u have found another world of your own, isnt it?
in my heart, i can no longer hold inside, all of the love i used to hide...
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