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What Is Left Of Me
mInmIn
17
20th august 1989
Temasek Junior College
LOVES <3
Family
Friends
Tjc Swim Team
The special ONE
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!
lols. i needa update before the clock strikes twelve. OH NO. i din do alot of stuff this weekend. as in school work. kinda guilty. but i enjoyed the three days of celebration. =) thanks to everyone who made it possible.
FRIDAY: went to POWERPDP after the mazarin thing. oh no. i m getting more scared of the adventure tower and relied alot on the swim team for encouragement. i find myself so useless lahs. and so guilty. sighs. and mr loh came back in his NS clothes. lols. he looked so young. hahs. i really miss training. cld the promos faster end. >.<
ok. anyway, so me and qien rushed dwn to marina bay for e birthday steamboat. after clarence arrived, FINALLY we can go and eat. oh well. i jus ate alot of fish, vege, ham, already cooked food. lols. cant bring myself to eat the fatty fatty meat. lols. and only darren is cooking. hahs. me and huiting is practically like tais tais waiting for pple to serve us. hahs. and qien and angeline are so cute. hahs. ok i m random. but jus tink that they r quite funny sumtimes. den when they seem like quarrelling, me and huiting wld give each other that kind of look. hahs.
and i felt bloated in the end. like stupid lahs. i go drink so much water. hahs. so din eat the ice cream. and clarence was so funny. we got 7 ice- cream free. den none of us wanna eat except clarence and elvin. den clarence says call the auntie give in the form of installments. so that means he cld keep the receipt till the next time he comes for steamboat and collect the ice-cream. lols. which is -_-|
den after that, went arcade. stupid he ma called me. hahs. he asked if i finished the whole marina bay's food. stupid him. ok. den he wishes me happy bday. =) so i shall forgive him for suaning me. but after that, i called clarence to speak to him. if u noe the history btw clarence and he ma, u wld guess wad happened. so huiting called clarence to say I MISS U DIHUI. and he really did that. and HE MA hung up his phone. lols. we laugh like hell.
den after that, we went home. made alot of jokes on the way. hahs.
oh this is the most unforgettable joke.
i was telling huiting that i love the card alot. den huiting says," of course lahs. is i choose de mahs." den i give that kind of look.
den darren says," is cos i design the border de lohs." which the border is not really a border.
den clarence says," NO LOHS. IS COS I APPROVE OF THE CARD LOHS."
den all of us were like DIAOS.
so.
HUITING taste is not that good after all.
cos clarence has to approve of that
lols.
jus kidding
anyway, THANKS ROYALITIES AKA RIVER FAMILY FOR EVERYTHING.
i enjoyed each and every single moment with u all.
thanks for cuming dwn and for the present
dun worry
huiting
i love the present loads
cos it's personaised
and there are so many fishes.
lols.
SATURDAY:
so JING YI and i went out. ehs. to bugis. took loads of photos. talked about lots of stuff. den jonice came.
i love that top at topshop lahs.
ok random
anyway, i have loads of photos to upload.
but hasnt find the time
shall upload next time.
den jing yi jonice and sufen went to the mac to chat.
while i did my hmwk in the mac.
finally finished wad i wanna do.
so they brought me to the blk 111 playground after the clock strikes twelve.jonice was v funny. sufen called her not to throw her bottle of water away. and just as sufen finished her sentence, jonice walked past a dustbin and there she goes, throwing the bottle of water into the dustbin. and we laugh like hell. for her sillyness.
okies. so we reached the playground. and waited for zhiwei to come dwn. and jing yi brought in the cake. was damn touched lahs. i mean. zhiwei was like saying, aint u touched. u have four of us to celebrate with u the first hr when u turned 17. damn touched. wanted to cry when sufen sang a solo bday song while i cut the cake. i m really grateful for wad they did.
den we ate the cake in the primitive way. meaning we din cut the cake. we use the fork and jus eat it like that. lols. and the cake can say like kanna smash like that. hahs. den we took loads of photos. jonice, sufen and jing yi went to do pole dancing while i chatted with zhiwei.
sumhw, i tink if i cld get to mix arnd, i tink i wld see the world in a broader perspective. ok. random again.
so chatted loads with zhiwei while jonice jing yi and sufen went arnd the playground playing and laughing like mad. hahs. i duno wad were they dd. den zhiwei went off and we continue playing pics. hang arnd till one plus am den clear up the mess and went home.
THANKS JING YI FOR PREPARING SO HARD TO MAKE THIS DAY A MEMORABLE ONE FOR ME. sorry. make u din study for sat. thanks alot. love u loads.
AND THANKS SUFEN, JONICE AND ZHIWEI FOR BEING WITH ME FOR THE FIRST HR OF MY 17TH YR OLD.
SUNDAY:
okies. ehs. morning wasnt exactly nice for me. had quite a bothering morning. but anyway, so went out at arnd 1 sumth. with carol and mj. THANKS FOR THE HUGE HUGE PINK PIG. it's so huge and huggable. *hugs*
so we went to watch ghost game. omg. 3.5/5. i wld rate that. but i cldnt understand the ending. stupid. i hate this kind of show. dun tell me the ending one.this is the first time i manage to open my eyes tru out the show. perhaps cos i m a auditory person. so i choose to shut my ears.
den mj closed her eyes. cos she visual person. we thought she slept lo. lols.
we crapped alot. sighs. i miss the times back in cchms. hais. jc life sux.
ok. anyway, we cldnt go kbox cos of the weird timing. so initially we wanted togo to marina south for steamboat. but eh. i jus had it on fri. so in the end, we decided to go pasir ris park to eat the eh. wad's that call?it's zhu chao in chi. lol. anyway, i tink my bday like v dua pai lahs. lols. cos we lost our way. and someone has to lead the way for us. lol. thanks ya.
anyway, the mai pian prawn rocks!!! yummy yummy yummy. and the scenery is really nice. perfect for couples. lols.
actually we got make quite a no. of jokes in btw. but i cldnt rememeber any now. >.<
but jus wanna say thanks to carol and mj for making my day. thanks for giving me such a memorable bday. i really enjoyed it. and bringing me arnd to eat. at leastm, not steamboat again. lols. and eh..... thanks for having lollipop arnd. u all noe wad i mean. lollipop is really nice!!! =)
i m kinda guilty that i din really spend time with daddy and mummy this weekend. sorry. >.< and i guess i m gonna flunk my bio test and maths test like shit. i DIN study at all. oh well. wadever. birthday is once in a yr. i wld nt wanna spend it on looking at papers. hees.
these three days have been really memorable to me. i cldnt imagine life without all these best buds arnd. kinda missing everyone now. i guess this accounts for the moody feeling i m having nw. i kinda wanna give everyone a hug and wanna say a BIG THANK YOU for each and everyone of u who has made my 17th birthday a great and memorable one. once again THANKS.
and oso thanks people for remembering. even a msg wishing happy bday is enuff. it's the thought that counts. thanks for remembering. though for some i din reply u all back, but yupps. i received ur wishes and thanks. shall not list the people out. cos the clock is striking twelve soon~
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME
HAPPY BIRHTDAY TO ME
HAPPY BIRHTDAY TO ME
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME
and with this,
i turned 17.............
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i m touched by what they did
yupps
really touched
but cld not walk home and talk to them
cos got swimming meeting
hmmm
anyway
sorry for flaring up today
to whoever
yupps
guilty
SORRY
argh
i m dwn with flu
feeling damn sick
i cldnt concentrate at all during lessons today
i just wanna slp
i HATE flu
finally the organic chem test is over
=))
thanks to all who cheered me up these few days
love u all so much!~
my napfa today is >.<
feel really bad
it's kinda
hmmm
cant meet up the expectations of a swimmer
hw can a swimmer be like...
me....
anyway
i realised that it's not 6sec for 2.4km
but 2 sec to a B!!!!!!!!!!!!
shld i retest????hmmm
and today Mrs Goh told me that she WAS my mentor
but someone took me away
T.T
i tink mrs goh is really a nice teacher
sobs
why cant she be my mentor
and who is that person who took me away
hope that person is better than mrs goh
but i still love mrs goh as my mentor nehs
sobs.
and she still cld rem my NAME
lols. proud of myself
hahs
i got a pile of ths to do
but i m feeling so sick that i cant do anyth
T.T
_______________
pissed off
anger
disappointment
tired
sick
just PISSED
_______________
just a random post full of random thoughts except one.
i shall not be a KPO and organise such outings anymore
in the end
pple blame u for being angry and stuff
im angry
but disappointed
when some cldnt put themselves in ur shoes
thinking that organising outings are just informing
and informing
and when people pangseh
u jus inform
so it's jus INFORM
the date, the time, the venue
nth else
hw about trying to consolidate the times when the most people can make it( for ur info, we r holding outings which include people not in TJ. so their timetable is totally different)
hw about trying to make sure that people are happy with the programme lined up
hw about trying to make sure the budget of the programme is alright
hw about trying hard to persuade people to go (the hardest of all)
hw about thinking of the best time, besting venue, best activity blah blah blah
and after planning so much
what do u get
PEOPLE PANGSEH
and nvm
They think that it's alright to do so
cos ur job is only to INFORM
wad for care about hu is going and hu is not
just those who wanna go go
those who dun wan dun go
hahahahahahaha
laughing my head off
would this be a successful outing
afterall i dun see the pt of gg
okies
i shan't care anymore
i shan't stoop myself so low and persuade pple to go
afterall why do we need such outings
when people dun even understand hw u feel
that's the ending u get for being a KPO
so morale of the story:
dun be a KPO and organise outings cum bday parties for other people
cos no one will appreciate it
and wad do u get
ppl thinking that u got nth better to do.
we shall just stay at home and hibernate
and study
study
study
oh well
i have a much more interesting life
i m not pushing the blame to the people involve.
i noe i mayb at fault for over reacting
but it jus kinda disappoint me when u all felt that u all aint wrong AT ALL
and blaming me for everyth
that's wad u get for being a KPO
i love this para from huiting's blog
it spells exactly wad i feel
about you-noe-wad thingy, i duno wad to say either. i mean, as ive told somebody. im trying to keep everybodi together too. but if pple wan to walk away or choose to walk away, they can gladly tell us. i dun wan to be a kpo to zi tao mei qu to organise stupid outings wit no meaning. i mean, i can always dun include u if u dun wan to. ur birthday isnt impt to me either. its not mine wad~ i just thot it'll be nice to have someone or a group of someones to rem ur bday and celebrate wit u, to give u a surprise and show that u r being cared for. but apparently, why are we always the one wanting ppl to get together and making as thou we are forcing pple to come?
and huiting only tried to organise one outing. and she has this kind of feeling le
hw about trying to organise four to five outings in 7 months
and in the end
u r just being too KPO. sighs
okies
i finish my piece
again
i m not exactly angry
but disappointed
so well
it took 8 months to realise that
we DUN UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER AT ALL
AND CLDNT EVEN TRY TO PUT ONESELF IN THE ORGANISER'S SHOES
huiting pangseh me today
din run 2.4 km with me lols.
sighs
life is getting more and more stress
i m tired
tired tired
hais
PW
it's such an irritating sub
cld we abolish it
pls hais
IT and APPLIED SCIENCE school food rocks
but i gained 0.5kg as a result
sighs
i dun dare to eat so much anymore >.<
sobs
i aint training much
i m having a phobia of water
cos of that time when i felt so gooey and feel like vomiting
that feeling sucks
i m afraid that the feeling wld be back
bt i cant wait for PROMOS to be over
i wanna SWIM
hw i hope MR RAVI cld give me a little less hmwk
trying to memorise the things that occurred from 1900 to 1949 aint easy
organic chemistry test on mon
i MUST do well! yupps
i m glad that HUIYI da jie is talking to me le. =))))) *beams*
i cant imagine life without her
luckily she aint angry anymore
i rem she said b4
"with effort, friendship stays"
which i totally agree
so sometimes, ur effort jus aint recognise at all
and people dun see the point of putting in effort
but well
the fact that me and huiyi cld maintain this 5 yrs of frenship
regardless of the fact that she left cchms when i was sec 2
was bcos of EFFORT
we are still so close as ever
it takes both hands to clap
and i m glad to have her beside me. =))
once again
sorry for that day.
yupps.
i simply love my daddy and mummy to bits.
they are getting cuter by the day. lols.
cuter in another way. lols
sighs.
off to do my essay AGAIN. SIGHS
_______________
i m damn angry now.
SORRY is not a word that can cure
get it
i dun wanna hear a single sorry animore
wad's the use of saying sorry
i WONT EVER DATE U ALL OUT AGAIN
out of 10 times which we decided to go out,
9 times u all last minute say cannot
and it's sending messages that say " CANNOT" TOGETHER
wtf
and it's u all hu want it in the first place
EXCUSES EXCUSES EXCUSES
i m damn irritated
pissed off
wadever
i have been tolerating this for the whole day
fuming mad
wad's the use of saying hw much u all valued the frenship
when u all showed nth but shit
pile of shit
like wad huiting said
even if the whole world dun wanna go
we will jus go eat seoul together
afterall
it's the people who really cares who matters
and seoul garden is much nicer aniway
i dun need this kind of frenship anyway.
okies.on another note,i love today's training
after running 5 rounds
went to play bball with the guys
and it's only me
the gal there
lols
glendon was really nice to encourage me on the way
cos for some times
i felt really guilty for making them lose >.<
but bball was fun!!!
too bad
i cant go and watch "click" with the swimmers tmr
at least i know that they are really nice people to be with
they wont give u EXUCSES ON THE WAY
saying SORRY when it doesnt cure at all.
Let me clarify
i m not angry with the fact that u all are not gg tmr
but angry with the fact that this is the 918448027027580720 times u all say u all cant make it
and it's cos one person cant make it
the other person says cant make it too
and it's when u all say u all wanna go in the first place
and prob is u all only tell me
and i have to be the bad person to inform others
when it isnt my fault at all
no matter hw much u all show nor say that u all value this frenship
i guess it's jus words without actions
or rather at least
i guess i cant feel it animore
nor do i wan to try to feel it
it's really tiring
i m not gg to hold on anymore
i m jus gg to value those who really matters
and who really cares
it's u all who tries to break it up
so shut up about saying hw bad things are now
oh mayb
u all nv tot of hw bad things are b4
cos whether the frenship stands or stays
it doesnt matter a single bit to u all animore.
i love to be with the swim team~ but sighs. i needa prepare myself for the next BIG th. sighs
mr loh says i m in for the MAZARIN programme
which i have yet to see the results
hmmm.
_______________
I M TIREDcan the freaking JC system be less stressful. it really sucks. i dun even have my own time, time to spend with my family. my whole weekends are packed packed packed. and why mus there be PW. it's taking all my time away. jus freaking irritated. i m jus spending each day with books books books. papers papers papers. IRRITATED. argh.
i miss swimming. i wanna swim i m putting on weight cos of the lack of training. another irritating thing. i wan training!!!! once again, our trainings are compromise due to PROMOS. studies AGAIN.
i rushed 3 essays out today. in total, i churn out 2000 words. my brain is dead. utterly dead. and i still have so many readings, tutorials, spa, lecture notes to read, to do. could the teachers understand that we only have 24 hrs a day,7 days a week in which more den half of the time is spent in school already?!!!we r not robots. we need sleep too. so hw many hrs left to study? and they still blame us for not catching up, blah blah blah. like wad the hell. it's not as if we r jus dd that pathetic sub. we are dd 6 subs!!!! and each sub has such a so damn heavy syllabus. and wad stupid H1,H2,H3. it only makes our life miserable.
okies. i finish venting my frustrations.
on another note, thanks ms sue for taking my 2.4 km timing today.
sighs. i miss by 6 seconds to a B. i tink i will re-run. i wan a B. though standing board jump wld jus makes things worse.
thanks ms shu for congratulating.
and ms shu was so damn funny.she was saying she used to run 16 mins. nw she cld run 1357. duno why. dots. it's cos u train for swimming mahs. swimming has proven to be able to improve ur stamina GREATLY. really. both of us improved by 3 plus minutes within 5 to 6 months of swimming. GREAT!
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