moi mood ishx seriously dwn nw..n i duno why...luckily pw mummy ishx not dat type of will quarrel with mi de when i sort of vent moi frustration..or else..haizz...u all shld noe the outcome of quarrelling...n i dun wan regret..i noe if i lsoe tis frenship i hab with pw mummy, i guessed i will cry till duno wad...i believed the lost will be far more painful den how i break up with carol n mj...thanks ferz cheering mi up anywae pw mummy...gib ya a sMiLe..=) s wad u wan..hahaz...but i still find it amazing y u find mi sad..cos i tot i m more angry den sad?! hahaz...
she told mi dat dere ish tension btw us two..i dun noe..i feel as if i m beyong caring for it..in e past..i used to care bout it..kipz on trying to maintain..but it seems dat i dun hab dat kind of feeling to do so..i noe..i hab tak her ferz granted..i believe..if one dae..i lose her..i will den feel the pain and feel regretful dat i din treasure her at all..but now..i still cant treasure..i duno why...n well...no matter how hard i try...things are still back to sq one..why?! i duno..but i guess the fault ishx with mi...cos well..i guess ishx cos studies hab been our priority...n we tend to compare ourselves with ur frenz and compete...but s wad i told jy dat tym..when she said she was shocked dat i lent her moi ss script cos well..she tinks that pple in our claz are competitive n tend to dun lend pple deir notes ferz fear dat person can do beta den u when u lend her ur script..but all i can sae ishx..i sort of kan tou tis th le..yahz...i do admit in the past..i do compete with pw mummy..pw mummy u shld noe ritex...den we even quarrel cos of it...but frm den on..i find dat it ishx meaningless...cos we r still gg to diff jcs nxt tym..n have diff goals in life..wad's the meaning of competing...we will be seaprated in the end..we will reach diff destinations in the end..isnt it more worth to treasure the magical bonding we hab btw us den letting competing our results weaken the bond n finalli break us up....at least dat's wad i felt... n nw..i cant stand competing..i cant stand the fact that we will hab to treat our frenx as enemies as so to speak...n to beat that person dwn by having beta results den dat person..i cant stand tis..i dun like tis..i dun wana hear tis frm moi frenx..perhaps dat's why i cant seems to get along with her..n things r getting from bad to worse..
i noe dat u r a gd fren..i realli hope to fulfill ur wish of having everlasting frenship..cos u once told mi dat i m the one dat treasure frenship alot..i wana treasure u..i wana gib u an everlasting frenship..but it seems dat things are getting harder..n i duno why...but as wad i said..the fault lies with mi..n i duno how...
all i can sae..ishx i hope dat u can tok to mi...cos i dun wana pw mummy to tel mi...or rather be the middle person..it will be communication breakdwn in e end..cos in the past..moi frenship with e other frenx oso like dat..cos we dun wan speak to each other ritex in the face..which results in the breaking up..well..but i believe we will not end up like dat..cos to mi...i feel dat all of u are dat kind of wont do things to hurt someone real badly...i duno how to sae..but i do noe dat there ishx a great diff btw u all n moi past...n i realli hope one dae we can tok it out..cos things are not getting ani beta if we choose to kipz to ourselves bahz....furthermore..ms k ishx gg to spilt us up..so well...i hope dat in e future..we wont becum strangers...
i hope n i hope we can tok it out......
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