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What Is Left Of Me
mInmIn
17
20th august 1989
Temasek Junior College
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Tjc Swim Team
The special ONE
hmmm...ytd gt qing gong yan ferz e performance...was quite happiez though...the juniors r sOOooO gd!!!!!!! gee...dey put up a performance ferz we seniors..hahaz...it was soOo nice of them norx...geee...well..thinking back..when i was a junior m i so gd nt huhx...hmmmm.....
mid year...cuming...haunting...i duno hw...i feel so stressed up...grrr..haizz...duno hw nahz...guess i'll hab to smoke tru it..bt well..it's the last exam b4 our prelims...isnt dat fast...it's realli fast..realli...i will leave cchms soon too..i gota miss it.moi memoriez are all in it...i wana stae on..haizzz....
cdc...a place where i m happiez n contented yet sumhw...i dun feel like bein in it sumtym..perhaps dat kinda feeling ishx nt here nw le bahz...wif such great juniors...bt well...i hate them..i hate...why mus dere be a fault in these beautiful memoriez i hab in cdc...i tot i cld leave wif beautiful memoriez...bt well...cos of them...i lost it...haizz...bt well..i still luv cdc...luv the stages that i hab been on...luv the roles i took..luv everyth...bt i hate...them...it's them dat caused everyth to happen..well..well...anywae...dey r nt wif us anymore..phew..
i duno wad i m saying...bt i cant bear to leave..haizz...
sooOOo pw mummy...u hab becum ah ma le..hahahazz...cos i adopted two daughters n one sis...kekex...all moi juniors norx...dey simply rockzz....luv them lotzzz....thanks ferz being such great juniors nehxx...kekexx...
i still miss moi tuition cher...i hab been harping on it...dun tink otherwise...i don hab any intentions ferz saying tis..esp pw mummy n denise..hahazz...anywae...well..i nearly broke dwn tis wk again...last wk cried in front of denise..she was like......cos well..she tot ishx cos of she being a bit fierce dat make me cry..bt no nahzz...she ishx sOoo gd to mi..thanks ferz putting up wif mi...thanks ferz teaching mi sOo mani things...thanks ferz being there ferz mi..thanks lotxx...i realli nidz you! i dun wana be separating the seats wif you..grr...why mus we change seats..grrr....denise...pw mummy...i'lll miss u! if i happens to sit sOo far awae frm all of you nahz...=( which i hope nt...geee...i wan moi tuition cher to cum badly..i cant understand nor comprehend alot of things...getting denise so hmmm.."fed up" wif mi sumtyms...hahazz...sorriex..=( i nidz him to explain sOoo mani things to mi..i realli nidz it badly...argh...aniwae...gd luck to his exams in nus engineering though..hahazz...nxt wk will be moi turn to mug hard le..haizz...
hmmm...anywae...i miss wed...why nehx..i oso duno...hahaz...bt mi n pw mummy was so siaoz...perhaps mi onli nah...bt well...hey...pw mummy..u oso siaoz over kfc chicken worx..hahaz...anywae..i enjoy the time wif pw mummy...we were chatting bout so mani things in life..which we seldom can sit dwn n tok soOo in depth...cos well...mugging ferz studies ishx our priority? or perhaps ishx more impt bahzz...pw mummy..i hope dat we can hab more of such tym okiex?certainli in the june hols bahz...though nidz to mug hard..bt i oso wana spend tym wif all of moi frenz...gee...
n sh nu er..hmm...thanks ferz being such a great nu er..as wad i said..i realli din sense anyth wrong tis year..at least ferz all i noe..tis year ishx much much much beta den last yr...sumhw..we din realli manage to accomodate each other last yr..or at least ferz mi...bt tis yr..i find dat we r realli getting on well..so ur sms kinda shock mi..hahzz...bt glad dat we hab finalli cleared all misunderstandings..i hope so bahz..=) dun feel troubled le...u make mi so guilty u noe..hahazz...anywae...smilez kaex...u r still moi nu er! =)
well..i gota switch to mugging mode le..so well...pw mummy...i guess...u will receive more sms frm mi tis wk? hahaz..i will feel so stressed up n keep approaching u..n ur optimistic nature kinda cheer mi up..hahazz.thanks though....*mugging*
take care everyone in the meantym...dun mug too hard n fall sick worx...=)
n xw...thanks ferx teaching mi amaths..at least..i sumhw noe why le...why the stone gt initial speed...why the ht of building ishx when t=0..hahaz..thanks...
=sumhw i miss everyone soOo much...overwhelming emotions dat i cant seem to ctrl..bt i gota put everyth aside n mug hard nw..=
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the dream ishx finalli fulfilled..fulfilled....tis the last stage, e last show, e last moment i m acting...perhaps neva in moi life will i step onto a stage again...to act in a role le...it marks e end to moi life in cdc...haizz...kinda sad..tis 3 plus years hasnt been easy...3 "hu pan liu heng" performance...1 esplanade performance..everyth hasnt been easy...it is a hard n difficult route..bt i have finalli overcome it wif all others...moi juniors, moi directors n moi seniors...i realli luv all of them...w/o them, w/o their commitment every will nt hab been a success..."sheng","yin su ren sheng", the esplanade de lao tai po...n ytd...tian tang di yu...everyth has been so nice n memorable...bt if asked mi whether i wan to live moi life in cdc again....i wld sae no..cos the memories ishx more memorable n precious when u knew u can neva go back again..i duno wad i m trying to sae n wad m i tinking...bt ytd was realli a success...a dream...it was initialli a dream..bt nw it has bcum a reality...i did not cry at all ytd..surprisingly..i wana ctrl moi tears..cos dere ishx nth sad to be cried about...i wana be happiex ferz ytd...
i wana thanks moi tian tang di yu pple...thanks ferz all those memorable pai lianz...n chor min n yen yang...moi director n sm respectively...thanks ferz telling us wad to do...caring ferz everyone of us...thankss...i duno wad to sae...bt jus sumhw...i realli cant bear to put a stop to tis nw....frm the dae chor min n i wrote tis ju..aft much rejection of so much parts by the teacher...den the pai lianz...frm nt knowing hw to act till nw...everyone ishx taking up their role soOO well...all thanks n thanks...
n moi fu zhuang zu!!!...all the juniors...or rather e sec ones...r all soOo demoralised ytd initialli...soOo sad too..bt they managed to do everyth well..they did it! they did not disappoint candy in e end bahzz...though initialli they did...bt they realli put in efforts to make everyth soOo successful.so proud of them...bt dey were soOo tense up n scared...kekexx..duno hw to relieve their stress during the nitex show..kekex..bt well..guess onli the success of wearing the xin mo costume can relieve them...realli luv them..n to candy...u r a great leader...a great one..thanks ferz everyth...
hmmmm....haizz....aft the performance...the battle ferz o levels start...i cant hab passion animore...i gota keep it nw..haizz...did not realli get to c him ferz ytd performance..duno where's the seat he ishx siting oso...hahazz...dun care lahzz...juus wana act well..din realli go see the audience..hahazz...bt thanks ferz being such a great audience ferz those hu turn up ytd bahzz..
ytd has been so careless...grrr...aft the mama scene..nidz to go into the squeezy stage left n i cant see anyth...den oso dao ju blocking...was so scared...cos i dun hab tym to run over n quick change! was knocking onto the dao ju..when i finalli got out...into the back n wanted to run over to stage right...i fell dwn..grr...make so much noise..was so angry wif moiself...bt...i got moi punishment le...wahzz....moi whole left arm hurt nw...grr..i cant move it much nw...grr...tmr gt napfa summore...i cant do the inclined de lohzz...when moi arm hurt so much nw...haizz...hw hw...die le lahz...luckily ishx nt ritex arhx...hmmmm...den well..quick change.. everyth was gd..so proud..hahazz..of the sec ones...hmmm..dere ishx a big bum on moi head nw too..cos xie mu i duno knock onto who...haizz..bt i still like ytd!! kekexx....
judy cher nearly cried when weiting cried so hard ytd...thanks judy cher...ferz teaching mi everyth frm last year esplanade performance till nw..thanks ferz being such a great director..
welll....i hope tis memoriez can neva fade...i hope everyone can stae together...i realli hope...thanks again to all moi juniors...luv all of u lotzz...=)
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finalli the long detested phy test ishx over...which gives e reason why i m here updating though tmr ishx a sch dae..hahazz...gota do sum eng later..tmr writing speech..n formal summore...alwaes get the formal one nehx..stupid! haizz...speaking bout eng..mrs yee hug mi in claz todae!!!!!! so embarrassing norx...hahazz...bt well..i found dat mrs yee ishx realli a person hu do things veri de sa tuo..ehx..duno hw to sae in eng..hhahazz...
nw nw...i m getting paranoid n irritated easily sumtyms..perhaps due to pw mummy...hu hab such a BIG influence on me...*ironic* *hurhem* hahazz....anywae...i start to take test less seriously le..kinda like wad the pt of gg sOoO much fer a test...n compete against others jus to get a higher mark n hab dat kind of satisfaction..izzit worth it?! i duno..i onli noe if tis go on...the frenship can neva carry on like tis...cos i cant take it at all...i m a bad tempered person i shld sae..n i cant contain moi emotions at all..i do admit dat..bt i do hope the past few happiez daes stae...ishx like ishx sOoO hard to find dat kinda feeling again..i dun wan let it fade..bt well well..sumhw..u duno...bt i realli dun like pple to compete..i mean tink of it in pri sch..when u compete wif ur clazmates..to get that kinda higher mark satisfaction..nw cum to tink of it..wad it is? a void isn't it...i mean does it mean sOOO big in ur life..btw frenship n competing...izzit worth to gib up one th dat ishx so hard to get yet fragile over competing against marks?i duno..i dun like tis kinda feeling..i feel dat i may burst out one dae sumhw...sumhw..i dun like competing pple..healthy competition ishx gd..bt when u compete till u get paranoid n treated dat person n th sOoO seriously..i get pretty irritated..well..thanks to pw mummy..fer opening moi mind...*nods*
anywae...i hab a new tutor..hahazz...those arnd mi will noe dat i m overjoyed over tis..i duno why..bt sumhw...i like his teaching alot..i like HIS TEACHING...dun anyhw tink kaex..hurhem...hahazz..moi phy gt hope nw..kekex...and denise angel tutor ishx so nice n cute...kekexx...yeah...tmr seeing him...hahazz...i enjoyed his tuition...so nice nice...at least he does nt sit dere n tel u "i duno" answers which get on moi nerves..
n todae gt cdc...heard her toking wif chor ming over godffrey(??? spell??) hu ishx sick n actualli din wana pai lian..den went over to costume grp...den she told mi more nahzz...was like...pls lahzz...as a SM did u fulfill ur responsibility?? u sae ur ju 7 daes neva pai lian..bt ask urself..izzit cos of urself or wad...i bet u r involved too..even dun hab...wad bout the past pai lians..when u tel ur actors dat u cant come halfwae n left them waiting fer you n in the end sae "sry i cant make it". does tis make up fer the lost? nt at all..do u hab a valid reason?i m nt in e position to judge..bt sumhw...ur reasons are sOOO clinche n stupid...go tink of beta ones nahzz...lie oso duno hw to lie...n halo..he ishx sick nehx...n u jus scold him like dat..izzit justifiable nt...ask urself...or rather do u noe wad ur members feel bout you nt?i bet u dun...cos u hardly interact wif them...in jan pai lians..all i can see ishx u keep following him when he gt cum to tian tang di yu de pai lian..den ur ju like invisible de..den feb...as though u hab disappeared in thin air..n left all ur members wasting their tym off waiting fer pai lian which neva took place coZ of u! n nw..fancy u shouting n yelling at ur members when he ishx sick to pai lian n he jus hab to oblige n went on dd things though he ishx nt feeling well..ishx tis fair??? kinda irritated...it has been soOo long since i tok bout tis stupid person in moi blog..dun wana dirty moi entries..bt when i noe bout tis stuff..i was quite angry nahzz...i hate pple hu onli noe hw to tok n nth done..pls set a gd eg b4 scolding ur members..fer mi moiself..i dun mind to be scolded by chor ming or yen yang if i did anyth wrong fer pai lian...cos they r in e position to scold...u? i doubt so...dere ishx still more to cum..hw bout section 2?? hab u forgotten dat u r the SECTION LEADER of section 2! fancy seeing u late fer meetings...n sOoO on..the list ishx jus too long..n leaving things fer the other two leaders to do..ishx tis fair? shut up dat big mouth of urs when u cant even set a gd eg fer ur fellow members to follow...wad kind of big aspirations u use to tok bout last tym..all crap..rubbish..onli noe hw to tok...
jus feel dat it ishx unfair...
anywae..todae went to toilet wif angel to change into her angel clothes..she veri de cute..hahazz...shall nt mention wad happen..ishx realli duhzz..isnt it? hahazz...hur hur
hmmm..found out dat he gt buy the tix fer drama nitex..well..so he neva lie to mi..hahahazz..kinda happiezz..kekezz...cos..well...duno nahzz..i duno wad i m tinking..sumhw..i jus wish dat a miracle will happen btw us...bt ishx dere a nidz?*ironical*
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